Studying My Craft: Reading "The Intent To Live" by Acting Coach Larry Moss

I am getting my professional house in order. Addressing my fitness and dietary goals are a start. Now I need to address my continual creative education.

I went to college and a conservatory for acting but an actor's training never truly ends. I have bought a bookshelf full of acting technique books. I think it is about time I start reading them.

I enjoy taking regular trips to the Iliad Bookshop on Chandler Blvd. It is a fantastic resource for all things related to cinema, theater, acting, you name it. It's a used bookstore with such a variety of literary, spiritual, culinary and musical books I spend hours just browsing. And did I say it? It is a used bookstore to boot!

Nevertheless, at this point in my life I am realizing that I can talk the talk but I need to walk the walk and put into action all the big dreams I have for myself. I can buy a room full of acting books but they are of little value if I don't read them and play with the ideas they may offer me in the continual improvement of my craft.
As I take a hard look at myself, I know I have spent a lot of time talking about improving my craft, but to actually do that, it requires a disciplined approach.

That seems to be the theme of the day.

Commitment, self-discipline and consistency are the words I must acknowledge have been sorely missing from my life. Today must be the beginning of a new way of doing things. If not, why not? If not now, when?

Self-discovery can be humbling and inspiring.

I have decided to start my reading list with "The Intent To Live" by Acting Coach Larry Moss. I have not read it yet. I did however, find this youtube clip that has inspired me to get my act together creatively speaking. It seems appropriate to start reading Larry Moss and see what I can learn from his wealth of knowledge.

I look forward to opening my mind to this opportunity for creative expansion.



 

Step 2: Nutrisystem, Weight Watchers, Raw Food Diet or A Complete Lifestyle Change

As I allow my fitness options to marinate, it does not hurt to look at the other elephant in the room. The truth is that any exercise plan I go with or construct for myself will not be very effective if my eating habits are crappy.

I am not completely oblivious to the notion of healthy eating. I have done my share of juice fasts, explored vegetarianism, veganism, going raw, and eating low glycemic index foods etc. The challenge is I grew up in Philadelphia. This is the home of Tastykakes, Philadelphia brand cream cheese, Philly cheese steaks, hoagies, soft pretzels, stromboli, Philly style pizza, food trucks before they were chic, you name it! I admit I LOVE food.  I love cooking. Without question, pasta has been a comforting friend on many a quiet night at home. What is a diehard foodie to do? Food is one of life's great pleasures. How do I find a reasonable balance?

In an attempt to take my dieting seriously I have considered the Nutrisystem diet , the Weight Watchers Diet, even Jenny Craig but they are geared toward women and frankly, who wants to eat pre-packaged meals? Not me, thank you very much. 

The option of  adopting the Raw Food Diet does have a lot of appeal. The health benefits are clear. I just don't know how realistic it is to never eat any of the delicious cooked foods I love. I think I can incorporate a larger percentage of  raw food into my life but 100%? not a chance!

Yes, time for more marination. Boy, I have a lot of thinking to do.

Both steps are lifestyle changes. I have spent a lot of time dabbling a change. Clearly I have to address at some point my issues with commitment and consistency. If this was to assist someone else, I would be on it in a heartbeat. However, when it comes to myself, I tend to make too many excuses. Hmm. I am learning a lot about myself in this process. I want to remove as many self-imposed obstacles to my own success as I can.

I control  my destiny. I  must do the work.  

The Next Step: LA Fitness, P90X, or Something Completely Different?

Alright. I have entered the mindset that starting September 4th, I will have an exercise routine in place. I decided to pull the trigger after Labor Day weekend because, well it seems appropriate to give myself the holiday to enjoy without resenting my routine before it begins. Also I want to come up with something that I will truly get motivated by and benefit from.

I am not sure why, but I decided to investigate the P90X Workout option. It is admittedly compelling to watch their infomercial. The idea of getting a ripped body in 90 days in the comfort of my own home has me intrigued. I understand the concept of muscle confusion, Add that to a strong commitment to the diet and exercise routine and clearly results follow. They offer three different packages, depending upon how many accessories you want to get all at once. I have watched the infomercial so much I am surprised I have not gotten it already. I do have a friend who said she purchased it but never used it. Will I be the same way? Am I getting swept up in the hype or is this jumping into the deep end of the fitness waters when I should be entering in on the shallow side of the pool?  The question is, is this the best route for me?

  There is the LA Fitness option. Logically, I am already paying monthly dues so, why let the money go to waste? This would require mapping out a fitness routine to follow. I don't mean just getting motivated to walk through the gym doors trying not to feel embarrassed. I mean planning out what exercises I am doing what day and tracking the progress. If I don't do this, I will simply turn it into a "band aid" rather than a cure to my fitness issues.   I went in the past but I can acknowledge now that I never went with much gusto. It always felt like an obligation or an excuse to get out of the house and be amongst people. This mindset did not produce results. The LA Fitness option does require more planning on my part than simply ordering the P90X dvds and pressing the play button. If I am able to make this option work, it will have the potential of being extremely empowering. Hmm...The question still remains. Is this route the best route for me?


I am not going to figure this out today.  I will let these ideas marinate and see where my mind inspires me to go.


   

  

LA Fitness In My Future

I am not fond of the gym. The idea of getting up early or going late in the evening to workout on equipment, I am never fully sure I am using properly, is not what I call "fun". When I had a friend to go with regularly, I got into the rhythm of it but he hurt his back doing martial arts and when his gym days ended, I stayed home as well.

I am so bad at going, I ended 2011 with a Bally Total Fitness membership, only to discover in April 2012, when I got an unusually rare impulse to exercise, that they were now LA Fitness. For 4 months my automatic monthly dues payments were going to a new company and I was clueless. I was beyond embarrassed when the person at the front counter told me of the change of ownership. No hiding that I was not on top of my fitness game.

And here we are with the breeze of the new month of September wafting in my direction, I have a decision to make. Am I going to get my butt in gear or am I going to continue to waste money and time avoiding the inevitable?

Here's my dilemma. I know I need to get into a regular exercise routine for better health, reducing stress and simply improving my level of competitiveness in my field of business. I just don't know how to make it interesting enough to stay with it.

I think I am going to have to view this solely as a business requirement and work on a plan of action. Otherwise I will continue to make excuses.  I did say I needed to focus more on improving myself as a professional actor. I guess this falls under that category. Ugh.

Okay... My thoughts create my reality.  Time to change my thinking.    

Playing In The Rain

After so many days of ungodly heat, Rusty and I were pleasantly surprised by the sudden rain shower that greeted us on our 5 p.m. walk.  The children in my apartment complex were out splashing  in the courtyard laughing and screaming with delight. Rusty, however, was not amused. His general response to the sound of running water is to dash behind a couch and hope I will forget it is his bath time. Nevertheless, Rusty loves his walks so he tried to be a trooper, running out the door and splashing through puddles as we followed our regular route.

I felt like a kid myself, laughing and smiling at how good it felt to get wet and cool down from this latest scorcher. My mind drifted to my youth when we would all play in the fire hydrant on a hot and humid summer afternoon in Philadelphia as if we had just struck gold.

My wonderful trip down memory lane was soon interrupted by Rusty's annoyance with the increasing force of the rain. He tried  to seek shelter under the closest bush. I dragged him out and told him to get "pooping" and we'd both be back in the apartment in no time. Almost as if he understood, he did his thing, I picked it up, and we raced for home.

Some days it is nice to just play in the rain.:)  

A Case of Puppy Love

What has happened to me? It is close to 1 a.m., my apartment seems to trap the heat of the day into my living room and I can't sleep. As I lay on my couch watching the "tele"  trying not to think of the heat my useless air conditioner cannot rectify, my eyes drift to the neighboring couch I gave over to Rusty and he is fast asleep gurgling in his dream world. It is just too cute for words. He makes these odd sounds from time to time in his sleep that sounds like bubbles in his throat. Clearly he is dreaming something. I would love to know what it is but he is enjoying himself - I think.

As it is still less than a year since we came together, it continually sneaks up on me just how much he has wormed his way into my heart. He is for the most part  a quiet dog. He hardly ever barks.The most are these funny musical sounds like he is about to actually say something, perhaps burst into a song or something closer to a "meow" or a parrot imitating speech . When company stops by he is friendly and affectionate. If he hears dogs on the television or in the apartment complex barking, he makes a whimpering sound and dashes from the front door to the balcony off my bedroom in search of his fellow dog as if he wants to rescue them. It simply makes me laugh.

Taking him for a walk however is a different story. His time on the streets as I like to call it, made him guarded with other dogs. He makes up for his normal silence with a barking fit that is quite bizarre. Mostly it is with bigger dogs or dogs he initially meets on our daily walks. I know it is fear of the unknown because on our route we have a few dogs we see daily. The ones that are his size or smaller, he does his whimpering sound and greets them in friendship. The dogs bigger than him, he stands his ground as if he refuses to be intimidated.

Sadly in February, one day on our walk a large pitbull/boxer mix decided to race out of the building he stayed at with his owner down the alley from where we live. As we passed I waved hello to the owner. The dog charged at us from the back yard through the office building and out the open front door where he bit Rusty on the rear just as I yanked him in the air to relative safety. I swang around with this wild beast leaping for Rusty like he was a meal until the owner raced out and stepped in to get the animal away from us but the trauma had its effect.

(Hades' Gate where the hellhound "Cerberus" escaped)

Rusty recovered physically but his guard was up. The owners kept the dog away but we avoided the area for months. Then one day in late April without realizing it we passed by the back of the building where we were surpised to find the same dog in the back yard again. Like a bad case of deja vu, the same crazy dog wanted Rusty for his meal. Somehow it squirmed through an opening in the back fence that normally they blocked with a large trash can.and he charged us again.

I screamed for help holding Rusty high up in the air. Like Houdini, Rusty squirmed out of his harness and said "I'm outta here!" I blocked the wild dog's way to keep him from chasing Rusty. I was strangely overtaken with a need to protect my guy. The dog turned his aggression and rather large teeth at me and decided to try to make a snack out of me instead. I ran down the alley of my apartment complex distracting him from Rusty long enough for him to be too far to catch. The dog's owner finally came out and got control of that damn creature.

With him secured away, I ran after Rusty asking strangers if they saw him. I only heard he ran like a bat out of hell and no one saw more than a flash of him as he ran for dear life. I searched for 30 minutes screaming his name like a crazy person. It dawned on me that I had no idea if I was ever going to see Rusty again. He was scared out of his mind. The wild dog's owner begged my forgiveness but I wanted to ring his neck.

As luck would have it, the investment in my dog tags with my cell number paid off. The clerk at a liquor store three blocks away, called to say Rusty came strolling into the store a little terrified and seeking shelter. He put him in the back room and gave me a call. I raced over with his harness in hand, literally shaking with nervous energy. Rusty looked at me like "What the hell just happened?" I struggled for a minute trying to put the harness back on with my hands shaking from the sheer relief knowing that my little guy was safe and we could finally go home. I told the clerk the story so he didn't think I was some strange abusive owner Rusty was fleeing. He laughed and said Rusty probably decided after all that drama he needed a stiff drink.

As we left the liquor store, I think I was more traumatized than Rusty. He carried on like nothing happened. He wanted to keep on with our walk pissing on every tree and sniffing every blade of grass. I wanted to get him home and away from any other drama. The wild dog's owner found us and apologized again, seeming genuinely happy Rusty was safe. Rusty wagged his tail and didn't hold a grudge so how could I? The owner promised to no longer bring the dog with him to work since keeping him confined was more than they could manage. My desire to see that dog put to sleep faded to sympathy for the owner and whatever made that dog so intensely angry at the world. While Rusty was missing I wanted that dog dead! I never felt such fury before. It was a bit startling. In the end, I just couldn't bring myself to call animal control. Perhaps I was wrong, but I think the threat of calling was enough. He has no longer been brought to the building near our apartment and the owner says he is safely secured at home where he cannot hurt anyone else's unsuspecting dog.

It has been less than a year since Rusty came into my life but it has been an adventure without question. I have become this protective pet parent and he follows me around like we have been together for years. He makes me laugh with his peculiar ways but I wouldn't have him any other way. Perhaps in time I will learn how to get him to calm down as he meets new dogs on his walks but for now, after all he has been through, I feel patience on my part is something he earned.

He lives in the moment. A lesson he teaches me to emulate as often as possible. Hours of "The Dog Whisperer" did not prepare me for how much I still have to learn but it did help me to realize our relationship is based on the energy exchange that goes beyond words. With each day our bond grows and I am continually amazed at how much he is changing my life for the better. This journey I am on would not be half as sweet without him to share it with!  .

Moving My Career Into The Digital Age...

The beauty of life is that every experience is an opportunity to learn something new or kick your butt into gear to do what you need to do! With the euphoria of last night's performance drifting to a cherished memory,  I must now switch to the business side of acting.

Honestly, with all my training the thing I need to embrace most is the business side of acting. Performing all the nuances of a character is one thing, but managing my career like a professional and not a "starving artist" is a challenge. My nature is basically shy and that is not an asset in the entertainment industry. So, I am learning to expand my horizons and tread new territory as a professional artist.

Saturday I bought my first digital camera, a Canon Powershot A3400IS  from Fry's Electronics. I made this business purchase in order to document my journey and take any photos I could with cast members in case it could be used in the future for marketing purposes. I felt so proud moving myself a little further into the digital age until I realized the damn thing came with a cd, a million wires, a battery charger and an instruction manual I have no desire to actually read. Ugh... I know I will have to read it.

I got a little practice in with the camera annoying the hell out of Rusty who was my trusty "lab rat". To say he doesn't like getting his picture taken is an understatement. I definitely don't have one of those dog's who is a "camera hog". I snapped away and he either looked away, turned his back on me, yawned or stared at me like I was a complete idiot.

While on the Warner Brothers Studios lot for "2 Broke Girls", I took pics of everything I could think of where I was allowed to bring my camera including my dressing room. It was fun and helped me figure that sucker out. I was lucky enough to get photos of myself with cast members Garret Morris and Jennifer Coolidge. I also got a pic with my fellow guest actor  Ajay Mehta. Everyone in the cast and crew were so warm and friendly but Ajay is what you would call a "class act". I have seen him on countless television shows and feature films. It was so nice to meet and share the experience on the show with such a kind and generous spirit.

A part of my dressing room!!

Now, with the performance work done, I need to do my part to help this have the greatest impact on my professional progress. No matter how you slice it, as an actor, Kevin D'Arcy is my brand and I need to increase my "brand recognition". At the moment my only avenue is driving traffic to my IMDB page.

Industry executives check out IMDB for a look at where people rank to gauge what kind of following the actor might bring to their project if they were hired. I was recently informed by my manager that my rank is currently in the high 900,000's. Yes that is right, that is not a great ranking by any means. Regular visits to my IMDB page increases my ranking and getting people to click the Facebook "LIKE" button on my page helps as well. So what's the problem?  You mean besides being ranked lower than nearly 1 million other actors? Well, I have about 200 facebook friends who have liked me so far but how on earth do you draw interest until you are in a project that draws people to check out your IMDB page in the first place? As with so many aspects of the entertainment industry it is a "Catch 22". I need to get the word out. I have my work cut out for me.     

So, yes, I will be using this blog at times to shamelessly plug my work and encourage readers to visit my Kevin D'Arcy page and FB "LIKE" me there on IMDB. Hopefully that will just blend in nicely with my simply blogging about my life's journey without seeming too crass.:) Most of my life is focused on my passion for my career anyway. It will be a delicate balance but one I must do as a professional actor leaving his starving artist period in the past where it belongs.

There's No Business Like Show Business!

It is 11pm and I must confess I am a little delirious! I am drifting somewhere between euphoria and complete and total exhaustion. I just crawled through my apartment doors after an amazing day of work.

I started my last day on Stage 21 taping "2 Broke Girls". My training is in theater but performing a play a completely different animal from taping a sitcom in front of a LIVE studio audience. It was like a rock concert! 

The day began at 12 noon with a final camera rehearsal with background actors to add texture and reality to things as the director and camera operators locked in the various camera angles for each scene. We broke for lunch at 3pm for lunch at the WB Commissary, then the cast gathered in the make up room for a speed thru before we all dispersed to get into wardrobe and get our final make up retouches.

Somewhere around 5pm the audience was seated and the "ride" began. Music was playing to get the audience jazzed and an emcee got folks in the mood for a night of laughs! I didn't realize just how much fun I would have sitting back stage simply listening. An audience brought that extra something special to the evening that lit a spark into everyone's performance. You can imagine the areas of the script where you think the audience will laugh but it does not prepare you for just how loud or vibrant it will feel! The script is hysterical and more than a bit raunchy so folks were gasping and laughing and it truly felt like I was a part of something magical!   

Now my part was small but it was a blast! Before I entered for my scene set in an auction house, I took a deep breath and reminded myself that this was "my time to shine" and no matter what I was going to have fun and ride the wave of the performance wherever it took me! I LOVED IT! To have to hold my lines because folks were laughing at what we were saying and doing was simply exhilarating!

I have not felt so ALIVE as I did all day today. I am truly blessed that I get to live my life's passion! I am grateful for this experience and look forward to what the Universe is bringing me next!!!!!

Couldn't Ask For A Better Day

This is a crazy business I have devoted my life to. This morning I woke up, walked Rusty then worked my way over to Fox Studios for a fun audition. Going on any studio lot for an audition is an adventure. First you go through tight security and sudden;y you have to find your way through the maze of streets mixed with sound stages and faux NY neighborhoods. It's a bit "trippy" I must say. It sparks the kid in you and makes any audition feel like a magical journey. The audition itself was great. I made my way to the casting office of the show I was up for and left feeling like I nailed it. The rest is up to the Universe.

With the midday sun making LA feel like one of the nine levels of Hell, I  made my way back to the San Fernando Valley for another quick walk for Rusty then off to Warner Brothers for our "rehearsal for camera". The funny thing is, I spent 4 hours in my dressing room just waiting. I drifted about chatting with cast and crew not on set, took photos- trying to figure out how my first digital camera that I just bought works, and back for more waiting. They were running a bit behind doing pre-shoots so I literally worked for a few minutes running my scene to establish blocking for the camera operators and it was a wrap for the night!

Now that is what I call a good day.

Tomorrow promises to be much longer. We will have another rehearsal, a speed thru, then we go live in front of a studio audience. I can't wait! I am continuing to enjoy every moment and staying "present" for every glotious experience.

Did I forget to say it?

Life is great!

Soundtrack of My Life

So I haven't done much vegetating as planned. After chatting with mum, I got on-line again and the time got away from me. However, decompressing comes in many shapes and sizes. I drifted onto youtube and found myself listening to Michael Bublé's "Haven't Met You Yet".

It is difficult not feel good after taking a listen. Who hasn't had the impulse to burst into a dance number in the middle of a crowded supermarket:)

I'm making this the current soundtrack of my life. It immediately puts me into that feeling of joy and "knowing" that Life is Great and full of endless possibility!

I think I may just have to listen again and dance around the living room with Rusty for a bit. 

Sunday Morning "Recharge"

After seven or so hours of sleep, how is it possible to wake up feeling well.. exhausted? I think the truth is I have been running on an "adrenaline high" for almost an entire week. My body is screaming "Give it a rest already!"

The only thing that dragged me out of bed this morning was my desire to be a good "pet parent" and take Rusty for his morning walk.

I always say, considering Rusty is a rescue dog who lived on the street for who knows how long before I adopted him last December 4th, he has been amazingly kind enough to not poop or pee in our one bedroom abode. The least I could do is get off my ass enough times every day so he can "do his thing" outside on the grass without having to hold it in too long. I soooo lucked out with this guy!! We are a great fit and I will not rock the boat on the "poop" front.

It wasn't a tremendously pleasant walk as I still wanted to be curled up in bed but it  got the day rolling.

My only item of importance is going to Staples to get copies of my updated resume cut and printed. After that, I will have some laughs with my "mum" during our regular Sunday cross-country chat, then I am all about recharging the battery with a bit of television vegetation and some fresh avocadoes which I am for some reason craving at the moment. 

Happy Sunday!!!  .  

Late Night Viewing of "Hannibal" on Netflix... Not Smart

Last night, I was in the mood to celebrate! I ran over to my favorite neighborhood pizza joint, Dino's, for a delicious pepperoni and jalapeno with an amazing Greek salad on the side. As usual the place was hopping! I grabbed my goods and headed to my best friends apartment to catch up on things and watch a movie. We settled on "Hannibal". 

Now, I am a huge Anthony Hopkins fan. I even loved "Silence of the Lambs" so much I bought the dvd. However, I avoided "Hannibal" because I love suspense and am not so big on horror. Call me crazy but what I love about a great suspense is the characters don't check their common sense at the door. When bad things happen it seems to be a genuine surprise to the character. In horror films I just do not understand how a character's sense of self-preservation doesn't kick in.

In "Hannibal" two things bugged me. Giancarlo Giannini, who I also love to watch, decides to collect the huge reward for helping some creepy guy capture Dr. Lecter. I understood him wanting money to take his young wife to the opera but jeez. The moment he was told the guy killed 14 people and the guy was unmistakably creepy to be around, why would you ever be in the room alone with him and turn your back so he could get the upper hand?  The second thing was Ray Liotta's character. He works for the Justice department and is involved in some way with the current hunt for Dr. Lecter. So, if you decide to go away to your house in the countryside and discover a sparkler burning brightly through the crack in the doors going into your dining room, why would you walk in and not pull out a gun or something? I mean really, a sparkler only lasts for a minute or two until it burns out. Should that not be reason enough to expect you are not alone in your empty house? Wouldn't tracking down a serial cannibal give you the "willies" enough to have your guard up for strange situations?

While I didn't hate the film because watching Anthony Hopkins work is always a treat, I just was amazed at how stupid folks were in the story. This only says to me their actions were too much of a plot device. And one last thing. the final moment. What kid would ever be so hungry as to take food from someone on a plane as unmistakably creepy as Dr. Lecter? Where was this kid's parents? haha!

Okay I am really venting about this movie because I spent the entire night in a nightmare of being stalked by Dr. Lecter. I literally woke myself up saying I want this to stop and found myself drifting back to sleep to have the nightmare resume!  The only escape was being shocked awake by noise in the apartment above me.

At 10 a.m., the carpet was being completely removed from the apartment directly above mine. It felt like an army was knocking sledge hammers through every wall (although it was just the ceiling). I bolted up to find my poor dog Rusty freaking out. I went into fire drill mode grabbing clothes and Rusty's leash to escape the onslaught from above. It was all more than a bit of a shock to the system. The manager's wife apologized for not giving me advanced warning. Once I fully woke up I was more happy to have escaped my dream version of Dr Lecter than I was about the pounding that is still going on as I type this post.

Opportunity Keeps Knocking!

This has been an interesting year. Auditions have been spread out with dry spells and periods when I wondered if my career was getting lost in the Mojave desert. Then literally right after I made a personal commitment to changing my thinking to a sense of knowing expectation, I have gotten one audition after another! I even had to turn down one really cool audition because I was booked for the rehearsal I had today.

And the Hand of Opportunity keeps knocking!  I just found out I have another very cool audition over at Fox Studios in Century City on Monday. It is a few hours before my scheduled call time on Monday, and I am going for it. The audition scene is FUNNY so I know the Universe is gonna meet me halfway and make this work!   It is so nice to have the challenge of rushing from an audition to a television rehearsal!! My desert days have ended.

I have wasted so much energy dragging myself around whining about my lack of career traction. It feels good to have some genuine reason to celebrate without it being this pollyana pep talk to keep myself hoping for the best.

I know I am on to something with this thinking with "knowing expectancy" and I am going to make this as permanent a change in my thinking patterns as I can muster. If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

Life is great!  

Rehearsal. Rehearsal. Rehearsal.

Just got back from Warner Brothers Studios for my first rehearsal and "run thru" for the studio execs.  

To say I had a great time would be an understatement. I arrived early for my 8am call so I could take it all in. We're in Stage 21 and you literally enter the world of 2 Broke Girls when you walk through the stage door. You completely forget you are on the grounds of a busy studio. The cast and crew are all so kind and relaxed. The vibe is amazingly positive and welcoming. This is clearly a hit show for CBS!

The episode I am in is called 2 Broke Girls "And The Hidden Stash" directed by none other than Fred Savage. This man really knows what he is doing! As an actor himself he has a very relaxed and natural way of communicating what he wants from his actors. My scene came later in the script so I grabbed a seat where the LIVE audience will be on Tuesday evening and I watched the cast work each scene from one set to the next. It was like a mini workshop on the process of acting for a situation comedy. This cast is very talented! I learned so much just observing.

It is funny. I think there is no such thing as coincidence. Yesterday, I spent some time joining in on the discussion boards of "Blog Catalogue". I got very intrigued and engaged in a thought provoking chat on the idea of living in the present moment and the notion of "embracing" the moment. In some strangely perfect way, it was the perfect preparation for my going into rehearsal today.

When it came time for the rehearsal of my scene, I quietly reminded myself that this was my opportunity to embrace the moment I am in and enjoy the experience. The rehearsal went very well. Later, we started a full "run thru" for the Studio executives. In stead of getting nervous or wrapped up in any kind of self-imposed pressure, I calmly reminded myself of how lucky I am to be literally living my dreams! When my scene approached again, I once more reminded myself this was "my time" and I walked out with confidence and "did my thing"!  It was so energizing to hear the execs burst into laughter and I exited with a pep in my step. 

I could not have asked for a better day of work than what I experienced. I still have a rehearsal on Monday before we have the final taped performance on Tuesday. I feel blessed and I welcome more joy to keep flowing as I continue my time on 2 Broke Girls!         

An Early Morning Call!

Just got my call time from the Second AD and I must admit I am pretty excited! I will be hitting the stage bright an early at 8am!

Of course, that means I need to hit the sheets at a reasonable hour because I am generally a night person and I want to make sure I am totally refreshed and ready for anything that happens tomorrow.

There is nothing like good news to but a little pep in your day. Suddenly I am jazzed:) My thoughts were rambling all over the place. The phone rings and "BAM!" I am all about what I need to do to make tomorrow fun and enjoyable.

Life is great:)

When The Rain Comes...

This has to be one of my all time favorite mantras to keep me steadfast on the path of my dreams. With my mother and sibs living on the east coast, it can get very difficult to keep my head up.

At times, I come home from an audition that just sucked and I question why I am out here on my own. No one stays upbeat all the time.

Sometimes you just want to be near the people who love you and know you better than anyone else in the world. I know this feeling will eventually pass because in the end, my life is here and my dreams are the foundation of what makes me Me. I could go back home but part of me would know I didn't belong there anymore. My home is here now.

Ideally when my dreams blossom into fruition, Going home on a regular basis will be my new reality. Until then, I rely on songs like this to pick me up and keep me going. A good cellphone plan helps too!


 

I'm Not Lost

Los Angeles, with all its occupants can sometimes feel like one of the loneliest places in the world. I guess that is why music can be such a comfort. This song just helps keep things in perspective when times get a little too challenging.

Not Built To Break...

This song has become one of my new favorites. No one can sing like Whitney could. This one is almost self-explanatory. It is a pick me up like no other.

Changing For The Better

This second song keeps me going and reminds me that yes, I am changing. Change can be a good thing if you let it! This one feels almost like a prayer of gratitude.

Listen...

Okay. Now that I got onto Youtube I am reminded of a few songs that I listen to from time to time to give me a boost of defiance and motivation to keep going. Hey there is nothing life music to put you in a state of mind. You might as well choose the state of mind you want to be in, right?

A Little Musical Inspiration

Have I mentioned how much I love a good song? It's funny. One of the things I noticed once I got back to acting was I stopped listening to music. It wasn't intentional. It just drifted into the background as I buried myself in the demands of that 9 to 5. But lately, I have been getting the rhythm back in my life so to speak and loving it!

Sometimes a good song and a great singer is nothing short of inspirational. Below is a Youtube clip of one of those inspirational moments. Watch the clip. Once you take in not just the song but the situation that unfolds you can't help but think magic does happen. 

Good Things Keep Happening

Last night I got the news from my manager that I booked a role on the CBS comedy "2 Broke Girls"! I'm playing a small part as a security guard in a funny scene.

This morning we did a "table read" with the full cast. It was so cool to be on the Warner Brothers' Studios lot doing my thing! I am excited to have this opportunity to grow and play with those talented actors. If the "reading" was any indication, this episode looks like it is gonna be a blast.

I intend to savor every moment. Life is great and I am embracing all that the Universe is sending my way!!

Who rescued Who?

On December 4, 2011 I found myself at the Burbank Animal Shelter just before closing time. Honestly I have no idea why I was there. I never owned a dog in my life and was quite satisfied with that fact. However, I had at the time, begun getting together to play cards with friends who were, are, and always will be dog lovers.  I kept hearing so much about their dogs and interacted  with those pooches so much at our gatherings that I actually started to consider their continual suggestions that I take the plunge.

The best advice my friend April gave me was to figure out what kind of dog I wanted and when the time comes, my dog would choose me.

So, I went there more or less to test the waters. It is one thing to imagine having a pet. Reality is quite another thing. I walked through those shelter doors and the intensity of a room filled with stray dogs excited at the presence of someone visiting was overwhelming. I found myself catching my eye on a small Manchester Terrier/Jack Russell mix. He was roughly 5 years old by their estimates. He was reddish brown with light brown eyes that seemed to match his coat. He looked as terrified to see me as I was to take him home. I walked on to look at others but kept finding myself strolling back to his cage. Our eyes locked. It felt like he was saying "Get me the hell outta here!" He didn't have a name just a number A38blahblah blah. The shelter was about to close. I went home and I started thinking of names and the best kind of dog food and I realized I was hooked. That damn dog had me wrapped around his little paw. Suddenly he had a name -"Rusty" and I knew I was about to have a permanent roommate.

The next morning, I raced down there and  grabbed him up before anyone else saw the beautiful creature I had.

Now, I cannot imagine what my life would be like if I didn't have Rusty around.

Look at his face! What's not to love? 

Leaning In The Direction of My Desires

I love the many Youtube clips of Abraham Hicks. I use them as inspiration to keep me focused on what I want.

Best Decision of My Life...

The one thing that unites us all is our ability to dream. Not just the adventures we escape to at night, but those powerful visions of how we want our lives to be.

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be an actor. As a teen, when I could not escape the neighborhood bullies who seemed to enjoy making my life hell, I found solace in the world of film and television. So many adventures...so many stories... so many characters to enliven my imagination and allow me for a little while to escape. I knew in time that I wanted to be a part of that world. Becoming an actor is the only thing that has ever made sense to me.

College gave me the opportunity to start my life's journey. Graduate school made my dream seem actually possible. Hollywood, however, was more than I bargained for. I soon realized that you never really escape your demons until you deal with them. The rejection after rejection was something you definitely have to plan for. I didn't. All the insecurities my teenaged bullies discovered came to the surface. I gave up. I found myself a 9 to 5 job and I imagined I could be happy and somehow find a new dream.  That never seemed to happen. Truth be told I did find professional success in that old 9 to 5 but one day I got offered a major promotion with a healthy salary. I thought about it and realized I was not happy. I was surviving but I was not living. It was in that moment that I realized I was going to either live in regret or I was going to listen to my heart...follow my dreams once more... and return to acting.

That was the best decision of my life.

Now a few years have passed and I am slaying those demons that made it so easy to give up on what matters to me the most. It hasn't been a cake walk but when you make a decision to step up and live the life you actually want for yourself, the Universe opens doors to help you.

Yes, I do have a friend or two who firmly believe you have to make it by 28 or 29 if you want to actually have an acting career. I simply refuse to accept that as fact. I am going to keep my dreams alive no matter what, and I will keep on dreaming til I can't dream anymore.

I am a firm believer in the concept that your thoughts create your reality. As I focus on what I want and let go of what I don't, I know ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

This blog will be my means of keeping myself on track and if anyone other than myself gets something from my words, that is just a bonus.